致家长、同行与行业同仁的一封信(A Letter to Parents, Colleagues, and the Martial Arts Community)

Grace Yan

在比赛来临前，我们谈谈“公平”这件事

亲爱的家长朋友们、同行教练与赛事组织方：

还有一周，孩子们即将走上比赛的舞台。每一次比赛都是一次检验，一次锻炼，一次期待，也可能是一场磨练。

但在这份期待之外，我想坦诚说一句心里话——去年的比赛经历中，曾出现的裁判偏差与组织混乱，不仅影响了比赛结果，更动摇了很多孩子对武术的热情与信心。

我原本有一支训练稳定、拼劲十足的中学队伍，在那次比赛后，逐渐将武术从“热爱”变成了“锻炼工具”，把它从“梦想”变成了“过渡选项”。这种改变，让我既心疼，也警觉：如果比赛变成了孩子们信念流失的起点，我们是否该停下来，重新检视这个平台的价值？

Before the Competition Begins, Let’s Talk About Fairness

Dear parents, fellow coaches, and event organizers,

In just one week, our students will step onto the competition floor. Every competition is a test, a challenge, and a chance to grow—and sometimes, a moment of disappointment.

With that in mind, I’d like to speak honestly. Last year’s competition included some clear instances of inconsistency and unfairness in judging and event management. These issues didn’t just affect results—they shook the confidence and passion of many young athletes.

I had a dedicated, motivated middle school team who, after that experience, gradually lost interest in martial arts as a competitive pursuit. They began to see it as merely physical exercise—not a dream to follow, but just another option. This shift deeply concerned me. It made me realize: if competitions become the reason students lose faith, we must pause and reflect on the true value of this platform.

比赛是孩子们展示努力的平台，也是我们成年人体现责任的平台

我们都知道，比赛不可能十全十美，裁判也不是机器。但哪怕无法做到“绝对完美”，我们是否能共同努力，建立起“相对公平”的底线？

• 公正一致的裁判组合；

• 透明的评分与流程；

• 及时回应异议的机制；

• 对孩子成长导向的重视，而非只看结果的奖项排列。

这些，才是让一个赛事真正有生命、有未来的基础。

Competitions Are a Stage for Young Effort—And Adult Responsibility

We all understand that no event is perfect, and referees are human. But even if absolute perfection is impossible, we can still strive for a baseline of relative fairness. That includes:

• Balanced and consistent judging panels

• Transparent scoring systems and procedures

• Clear responses to disputes or confusion

• A focus on development and learning, not just medal counts

Only with these elements can a competition truly build trust, growth, and long-term integrity.

家长的角色，不只是陪伴，更是守护

亲爱的家长朋友们，这次比赛，可能孩子会遇到顺利，也可能再次遭遇挫折。但我想邀请您——不把比赛当作评判孩子价值的标准，而是看作他们内在成长的过程。

我们可以问孩子：

• “你有没有尽全力？”

• “你有没有照顾别人、为团队尽心？”

• “在面对委屈时，你有没有调节情绪？”

• “明知不完美，你还愿意热爱吗？”

这，就是最好的教育。

Parents Are Not Just Supporters—They Are Protectors

Dear parents, this weekend your children may experience both success and frustration. I invite you to see this not as a measure of their worth, but as a part of their personal journey.

You can ask your child:

• “Did you give your full effort?”

• “Did you support your teammates?”

• “When something didn’t go as expected, how did you handle it?”

• “Even when things weren’t perfect, do you still love what you do?”

This is the real education.

家长不只是观众，更是赛事公平的守护者

我们也诚挚地希望，家长不仅是孩子比赛路上的陪伴者，更能成为赛事的监督者和建设者。

在制度仍需完善的阶段，家长的反馈、观察与发声，是推动比赛走向更规范、更透明的重要力量。当我们愿意一起提出问题、记录问题、反馈问题，我们就在帮助赛事组织者看见盲区，帮助规则成长。

孩子在赛场上成长，大人也可以在观赛中承担责任。

我们不是站在对立面，而是希望在同一条路上，共同打造一个——孩子值得投入、家长愿意信任、教练愿意坚持的武术平台。

Parents as Advocates for a Better Competition Culture

We also believe that parents can be more than spectators. You can be advocates and stewards of fairness.

While the competition system is still evolving, your observations, feedback, and questions are vital to shaping a more accountable and transparent event structure.

When we speak up together—with respect and clarity—we help organizers notice blind spots and inspire positive change.

As children grow on the competition floor, we too grow in how we protect and shape the environment around them.

We are not standing on opposite sides—we’re walking the same path. Let’s build a tournament platform where students feel proud, parents feel confident, and coaches feel supported.

写给行业：我们一起建立值得信赖的平台

武术是一项立身立德、修心修行的运动。比赛不只是“赢”，更是一个价值观的舞台。如果我们失去了公正，失去了尊重孩子努力的态度，再多的奖牌，也只是空壳。

我们想要的不只是一场热闹的赛事，而是一个让孩子们愿意坚持、愿意热爱的行业。

希望今年的比赛，不仅比出成绩，更比出信任、比出公正。

这需要组织方的用心，教练们的坚守，家长的理解——也需要我们每一个从业者的良知与担当。

让我们共同守护：一个值得孩子们热爱的武术世界。

To the Industry: Let’s Build a Platform Worth Believing In

Martial arts is more than a sport—it is a path of character, discipline, and heart. Competitions are not just about “winning.” They are a reflection of values.

If we lose fairness and respect, then medals become hollow.

We don’t just want a big event—we want a meaningful one. One that inspires, uplifts, and guides our next generation.

Let this year’s competition show more than skill.

Let it reflect trust, fairness, and integrity.

Let us work together to protect a martial arts world our children will be proud to grow into.

公平公正，是行业可持续发展的根基

在任何一个行业的发展中，公平与公正不仅是一种理想状态，更是一种结构性力量。它像空气，看似无形，却时时刻刻影响着整个行业的生态与走向。

在教育、竞技、艺术、体育等与“人成长”密切相关的领域中，公平公正的价值更显突出。它不仅决定一场评比或一项结果，更决定着一个人——特别是孩子——是否愿意继续坚持、继续相信、继续热爱。

1. 公平公正是“信任”的源头

只有在公平的制度下，参与者才会相信自己的努力是有意义的，才敢于全力以赴，不担心被忽视或被误判。

当信任建立，行业才可能形成良性循环：更多人愿意投入、更多人才愿意留下、更多资源愿意进入。

2. 公平公正是“激励”的动力

如果优秀得不到应有的肯定，努力看不到应有的回报，行业会变得冷漠、犬儒，真正热爱的人也会慢慢沉默甚至退出。

而公正的环境会让人产生“我可以靠实力走下去”的信心，从而激发长期的热情与韧性。

3. 公平公正是“规范”的基础

行业在初期可以靠热情发展，但走得长远，必须依赖明确、透明、公开的评判机制。

规则清晰，执行一致，不仅可以减少内耗，更能避免人际之间的纷争与猜疑，让行业的发展走向专业化、系统化。

4. 公平公正最终造就“文化”与“尊重”

一个行业的气质，取决于它如何对待每一位参与者。

如果我们能让每个孩子、每位教练、每个家庭都感受到尊重和公正，这个行业所建立的不只是“成绩”，而是一种有温度、有格局的精神文化。

公平公正，不只是比赛的规则，更是一个行业是否值得信赖、值得托付、值得热爱的根本。

一个真正长久的行业，不靠运气，也不靠关系，而是靠一个个愿意相信它、愿意守护它的人，一起建立起来的公平秩序。

Fairness and Justice: The Foundation for Sustainable Industry Growth

In any industry, fairness and justice are not just ideals—they are structural forces that determine the long-term health and vitality of the system. Like the air we breathe, they may be invisible, but they influence every decision, every participant, and every outcome.

In fields closely tied to human development—like education, competition, the arts, and sports—the value of fairness is even more pronounced. It not only determines who wins or loses, but more importantly, whether a person—especially a young person—chooses to keep going, keep believing, and keep loving what they do.

1. Fairness builds trust

Only in a fair system will participants believe their efforts matter. They will dare to give their best, without fear of being overlooked or misjudged.

Trust fuels a healthy cycle—more people stay involved, talent continues to emerge, and greater support flows into the industry.

2. Fairness motivates effort

When excellence goes unrecognized or hard work is consistently dismissed, disillusionment sets in.

But when fairness prevails, people are inspired to improve. They think: “If I keep growing, I can succeed through my own merit.”

This sense of possibility fuels long-term commitment and passion.

3. Fairness creates structure

An industry can be built on passion in its early stages—but to sustain itself, it must rely on clear, transparent, and consistent rules.

When standards are well-defined and applied equally, the system runs more efficiently, and unnecessary conflicts or suspicions are reduced.

This is the path to true professionalism.

4. Fairness shapes culture and earns respect

The true spirit of an industry is reflected in how it treats its people.

When fairness is the norm, every child, every coach, every family feels seen and respected.

This builds more than just results—it creates a culture of integrity, dignity, and inspiration.

In summary:

Fairness and justice are not just competition rules—they are the very reason an industry is worth trusting, worth participating in, and worth dedicating ourselves to.

A strong, lasting system is not built on luck or connections. It is built by people who choose to believe in it—and choose to uphold it together.

面对失落，你怎么调节？怎么转化？

1. 面对失落时，先接住情绪

“我知道你很难过，那是因为你真的很在意、很努力。”

不是急着让孩子“不要难过”，而是先肯定他们的感受——情绪被理解了，心才会慢慢放松。

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2. 情绪安稳后，引导他们转化看法

“我们不一定控制得了结果，但我们可以控制面对的样子。”

“真正的成长，是在‘不是最理想的时候’，还能走下去。”

引导孩子看到：失落不是终点，而是通往成熟的一扇门。

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3. 提供内在的成长坐标，而非外在比较

“你有没有比上一次更冷静？有没有在想放弃时继续坚持了一下？”

“你学到的东西，是不是可以用在下一次？”

让孩子明白：失败不是“不好”，而是“还没好”。

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4. 转化失落的方法建议

• 写一段比赛日记：写下遗憾，也写下值得骄傲的地方；

• 把失落变成行动：开始每天多练10分钟；

• 和比自己小的队员分享经验，让自己成为“别人心中的榜样”；

• 学会安慰别人，也是在疗愈自己。

“真正让我们强大的，不是一直赢，而是在失落里也不丢掉爱与信念。”

How Do We Manage and Transform Disappointment?

1. First, acknowledge the emotion.

“I can see that you’re really upset—that’s because you truly cared and gave it your all.”

Rather than rushing to say “don’t be sad,” we first need to validate their feelings. When a child feels understood, their heart begins to soften.

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2. Once emotions are calmer, help them shift perspective.

“We may not be able to control the outcome, but we can control how we respond.”

“Real growth happens when we can keep going, even when things aren’t ideal.”

Let children see that disappointment isn’t the end—it can be a doorway to maturity.

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3. Offer internal benchmarks, not external comparisons.

“Were you calmer than last time?”

“Did you keep going even when you wanted to give up?”

“Is there something you learned that you can use next time?”

Help children understand: failure doesn’t mean “you’re not good,” it simply means “you’re not there—yet.”

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4. Practical ways to transform disappointment:

• Write a competition journal—record both regrets and things they’re proud of.

• Turn the emotion into action: commit to 10 more minutes of practice each day.

• Share their experience with younger teammates and become someone else’s role model.

• Learn to comfort others—because healing others can often heal ourselves.

“What truly makes us strong isn’t constant success,

but holding on to love and belief—even in disappointment.”

比赛有输赢，现实有缺憾。

可一个人真正的成长，往往不是从“成功”开始的，

而是从某一次“不被理解、不被看见”时，依然没有放弃热爱。

明知不完美，依然坚持热爱，这就是你最珍贵的力量。

There are wins and losses in competition, and imperfections in real life.

But true growth often doesn’t begin with “success”—

It begins the moment you’re unseen, misunderstood, yet still refuse to give up on what you love.

Knowing it’s not perfect, and still choosing to love it—

所有图片来自网络，与文章没有对应关系。唯一的对应就是通过图片展示武术美！

All images/photos are sourced from the internet and are not directly related to the content of the article.

Their only connection is to showcase the beauty of martial arts.