<p class="ql-block">@所有人</p><p class="ql-block">华夏微型诗社第538期周周发同题创作开始了。</p><p class="ql-block"> 欢迎诗友们参与微型诗写作！请早日构思打磨！</p><p class="ql-block">备注：</p><p class="ql-block">1、投稿、收稿时间：</p><p class="ql-block">2025年4月15日晚上7点——10点。</p><p class="ql-block">2、每人选投一首微型诗。</p><p class="ql-block">3、请单独发帖，不要自行接龙，由岐麟散人老师统一收稿。</p><p class="ql-block">4、稿件选编到美篇，并由诗社老师予以点评。</p><p class="ql-block">5、本期题目：</p><p class="ql-block">①《读书》</p><p class="ql-block">②《白发》</p><p class="ql-block">6.出题老师：岐麟散人</p><p class="ql-block">7、交流时可交流两首，投稿时只选投一首，收稿只收一首，点评也只点评一首。</p><p class="ql-block">8.优秀作品推荐“微诗坊”。</p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">顺序1</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/小乙</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">将满头黑夜捻成白昼</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">一丝丝光阴的故事</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">从少壮读到暮年</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岐麟散人浅读:首句从黑夜到白昼，尽显沧桑之感，“捻”字有力，而末句少壮到暮年写出诗人的无奈与伤感。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/午后</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">在疏林隐藏起所有云朵之后</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">秋山，不再与路过的风寒暄</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岐麟散人浅读:选择了不同意象，借“云朵、秋山、风”用拟人手法，写出对岁月流逝的叹息。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">吉新/广东</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">不要刻意遮掩苍老</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">我已经爱上</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">你头顶流动的云层</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岐麟散人浅读:直白语道出真情实感，犹喜末句。诗人借代手法高明，以云层代白发。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/蒋越红</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">一场雪 落在发梢</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">斑驳的记忆独对新月</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">叙述欢声与泪痕</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岐麟散人浅读：以雪喻发，借斑驳记忆与新月，融入欢声泪痕，尽显岁月沧桑之感。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"></span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"><span class="ql-cursor"></span></span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/丹霞</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">和古人对话</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">同外星人交流</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">你的牵手 是我的唯一</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岐麟散人浅读：把读书比作和古人对话、与外星人交流，想象独特，突出读书的另类体验。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/蒋越红</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">翻开记忆</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">与智者对坐</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">思绪在文字中驰骋</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岐麟散人浅读：一二句是动作，末句是结果，尽显读书的魅力。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/现实</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">符号，字句间跳跃</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">一页春风</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">灵魂里，丰盈多少光阴</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岐麟散人浅读：从符号字句入手，以春风为意象，展现读书对陶冶人情操的重要性。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/卢春杰</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">每天晚上闻闻墨香</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">时间一长</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">我也变得香了</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岐麟散人浅读：以闻墨香变香表达读书对人潜移默化的作用 。</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">顺序2</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/八乡人</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">睡前的盛宴</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">让眼睛亮</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">心更敞亮</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">紫塞长风简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 心敞亮，算是说到点子上了。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/执着</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">弯月，母亲的眼</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">游子何时归</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">青丝，祈盼中熬成雪</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">紫塞长风简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 青丝，熬成了雪，入骨！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/陈桂娟</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">不再纠结青丝变暮雪</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">那是岁月沉淀后</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">留下的最纯颜色</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">紫塞长风简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 表达过于散文化了，建议多用诗的语言，奇崛一些。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/付光渝</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">秋风数着湖中的芦苇</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">每一根都诉说沧桑</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">要与晚上的月光争辉</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">紫塞长风简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 秋风数着湖中的芦苇，这一句出彩。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/绿色</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">蘸着秋的味道，研磨一首</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">成熟的诗，岁月馈赠几缕霜花</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">没理由推辞</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">紫塞长风简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 秋的味道，成熟，几缕霜花，铺垫很到位了。“没理由推辞”虽然直白了些，里面却含了多少艰辛和付出啊，隐隐有耐之意。但从老人与子女的角度来理解，何曾没有无怨无悔之意？</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/陈兴茂</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">是你 融进我生命</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">于是 深深漩入你的故事</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">苦苦寻找自己的梦</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">紫塞长风简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 有书读，能读书，不愧为天下第一等好事。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/岐麟散人</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岁月浓缩成阅历</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">消失的青丝中</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">隐匿着步履踉跄</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">紫塞长风简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 这个“浓缩”好，让时光不能匆匆溜走，要有所行动，有所得，踉跄也是成长的必经之路。“白发”是来过的最有力证明！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/蔡厚炳</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">努力啃 使劲刨</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">那条小径</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">留下倔强攀登的脚印</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">紫塞长风简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 啃、刨，说出了读书的不二法门。</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">顺序3</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/苇强</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">走进黄金屋，牵手颜如玉</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">与爱同步</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">阳光明媚无垠的知识世界</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">赤道雪域简评:″与爱同步″，即是读书惠获，也是读书的真谛。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/道是无晴</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">翻开一段光阴，给还在</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">雨巷中徘徊的那缕丁香</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">找一家能从梦中醒来的客栈</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">赤道雪域简评:余香袅袅，欲结情怨啦！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/康秀炎</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">乡音未改</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">往事纷纷扬扬</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">从晃动的一头芦花飘出</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">赤道雪域简评:秋冬时节，诗人回到故乡，弥望的是纷纷扬扬的芦花，多么熟悉呀，它的青春，我的青春，往事历历，逢秋摇落，皆白了头，回不去了，感喟万千！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/老妖</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">从一二到中庸</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">十数个春冬夜熬</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">丑小鸭禅修白天鹅的辛酸脚印</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">赤道雪域简评:"一二″、"中庸"、"十数个春冬"、″丑小鸭禅修白天鹅"、"辛酸脚印″，这种借代十比喻，贯穿全诗，读来自然亲切！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文／喜阳柳保宅</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">头上，这片银霜</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">藏着我一生的</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">辛甜与酸苦</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">赤道雪域简评:比喻贴切，还可深入细腻些。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/书虫</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">挣扎于暗夜</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">也被暗夜抽走墨色</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">留几茎通透，抒写秋意</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">赤道雪域简评:虚实结合，拟人生动，末行耐品！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/高峰</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">月光 偷偷下凡</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">在母亲的发间定居</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">从此 故乡多了霜</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">赤道雪域简评:一落笔，诗人就将暗线玉砌:永恒的"月光"——永恒的岁月，永恒的思念，思念中，母亲一天天老去，白发一天天增多，可是诗人我身在异乡，不能膝下孝敬，心中无限惆怅！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/阳光</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岁月 这一款隐形染发剂</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">不经意间就会偷偷地漂白</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">你的青丝</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">赤道雪域简评:比喻大气新颖，关键是"岁月"二字共情煽情！</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">顺序4</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/空谷幽兰</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">辛劳攒积的银丝</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">或稀或浓，斑驳于头顶</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">购置生活的解结</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">巴山一松简评：解结：消除郁结；解开疙瘩。本诗可能表达一种释然或豁达，人有白发终活通透。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/古道白杨</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岁月结在头顶的霜</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">沧桑成 一种标志</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">高尚 令儿女膜拜</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">巴山一松简评：儿女理解到父母之不易，而感恩。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/ 刀郎公子</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">一瞬间，时间的使者快跑到</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">它对星星诉说着</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岁月痕迹的故事</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">巴山一松简评：首句不好理解，似乎不通。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/墨客吟</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">唤醒纸面上的小精灵</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">纳入岁月起舞</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">积攒记忆淘洗瘦弱的思绪</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">巴山一松简评：人在读书中成长壮大。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/张士杰 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">月光垂落的丝线 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">打捞半生沉浮 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">雪潮 在鬓角决堤 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">巴山一松简评：一个“决堤”让人亮眼，让人心动。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/森林雨</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">秋天到了</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">父亲，满头芦花飞扬</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">湿了眼眶，凉了心月</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">巴山一松简评：父亲人生秋天的的白发让儿女动容。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/剑风使者</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">几绺碎银买断光阴</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">细数沧桑</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">在一壶月光里，沉浮</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">巴山一松简评：简短三行诉说着人生不易。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/周其林</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">一壶老酒</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">历经岁月苍桑</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">醇香</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">巴山一松简评：历经苍桑，终得智慧。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/东方虹雨</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">光阴镀上一头银丝</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">借夕阳梳理昨天</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">沧桑的故事情节 跌宕起伏</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">巴山一松简评：回忆里，人生总是充满感慨。</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">顺序5</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白头</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/雪儿怀春</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">未退休已霜雪压顶</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">岁月梳理的辛勤痕迹</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">粉笔灰尘感染职业通病</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">昨夜星简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 起句不错！后两句显弱些。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/家乡小河</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">似鱼儿畅游海洋</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">忘却功名利禄</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">翩翩一身轻……</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">昨夜星简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 读书是轻松愉悦的，像鱼儿游来游去一样自由，随心所欲。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/往往醉后</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">每天 文字里畅游</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">页码就要超过年龄</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">却依然翻阅 生命的回声</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">昨夜星简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 整体思路，构思，连贯，流畅。“页码要超过年龄”是说读书久，时间长远。结尾的虚写，给人留下想象。较成功一首。有内涵，有自己的感悟。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/江南风</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">——剃光</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">青丝皆已尽力</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">涂一抹夕阳，羞羞时间</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">昨夜星简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 作者从一个侧面构思。“青丝”变“白发”有自然规律，也有生活的压力和不幸。伍子胥过昭关，一夜白了头。不论怎样，作者都是喟叹，生活中有些事情，也是力不从心，没有办法阻挡的！好在，还有一抹夕阳栖息头顶，遮掩一时的丑，足矣！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/赵正霞</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">扛起思维的犁铧</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">犁开三尺生宣 文字的果实</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">挂满心枝 墨香致远</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">昨夜星简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 开篇思路不错！“黑香致远”这些词汇，尽量别用在三行微诗中。从一点生发出去，写出属于自己的“读书”感悟。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读 书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/行天 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">历历文字造型</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">入味人间烟火 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">浓缩了全球风云 </span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">昨夜星简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 偏说理，而且用了大词。从小处着手，方好写。偏重在书上，而忽略读之意上。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/绿柳枫</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">知识的波浪每翻动一页</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">在文字海洋遨游的灵魂</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">就被光，洗礼一次</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">昨夜星简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 读书能带来愉悦，洗涤灵魂足矣！</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">白发</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/阳帽雨伞</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">为过往代言</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">特别强调</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">坎坷与泥泞，辛劳和泪水</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">昨夜星简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 用“为过往代言”阐释了“白发”在自己心目中的认识和顿悟。“坎坷”“泥泞”“辛劳”“泪水”分别隐喻生活中的苦乐酸咸，正是因为这些原因，让黑发早早变成了“白发”。</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">读书</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">文/巴山一松</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">学海是无涯，但无须苦作舟</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">此生甘做一尾鱼</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">将心和身沉溺，徜徉</span></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">昨夜星简评：</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 学海无涯，苦也好，着迷，沉浸也罢，只要自己快乐着，惬意着，充实着就好！</span></p>