九上福田区区统考英语高分作文赏析

高斌

<h3>英语书面表达一直是同学们考试的难点和痛点。这里,我们一起来解读和分析一下今年的区统考作文。</h3> <h3>现在开始复盘,先再次读一遍题目。认真审题别跑偏,是写好作文第一步。</h3> <h3>看看阅卷老师的评分标准:<br></h3><h3>一档:9-10分 四个要点齐全,无语法、结构、拼写错误,语言流畅,内容衔接合理。</h3><h3>二档:7-8分 四个要点齐全,有一些语法、结构、拼写错误,语言较连贯,内容衔接较合理。</h3><h3>三档:5-6分 漏写一、二个要点,有不少语法、结构、拼写错误,语言不连贯,内容有重复。</h3><h3>四档:3-4分 漏写三个要点,有不少语法、结构、拼写错误,语言不连贯,内容有重复。</h3><h3>五档:0-2分 只有一个。</h3><h3><br></h3> <h3>再看看阅卷老师对范文的剖析:</h3><h3> How to keep safe in school</h3><h3> Do you know that our school life could be dangerous if we are not careful enough? For example, one day two students ran after each other in the doorway. Suddenly, one of them fell down and hurt his leg because of the wet floor. (4分,用过去时描述意外和结果)Therefore, he had to stay in hospital for two weeks. So I think students should always walk but not run in the hallways. And the teachers had better keep an eye on the students after class and stop them from running.(4分,至少两条建议) At last, I hope all the students should pay attention to their safety in school.(1分,呼吁) 另外,衔接、连贯性和书写(1分)。</h3> <h3>欣赏一下九7吕佳同学佳作!</h3> <h3>再欣赏一下九7刘子杰佳作。</h3> <h3>小结:高分作文=信息全+结构美+英语味+书写好。</h3>